Perfection

14:58


Perfectionism is definitely what's been stopping me from blogging recently, and it's something that's affecting more than just my blogging aspirations. I know deep down that I'll only learn and get better by DOING, but I just haven't been able to step over that hurdle as of late. 

I get my laptop out.
Open a blank writing space.
Stare at the screen for 5 minutes.
Give up.

It's not like I don't WANT to succeed in what I love, it's that I don't want to disappoint myself with being bad at something. I'm afraid of being a beginner and for things to go wrong. I'm afraid I'm not being good enough to keep up with everyone else. I'm afraid I'll disappoint myself. The last one is the biggest fear for me, disappointing myself - I'm my own worst enemy and critic when it comes to doing anything with my life, and I have to constantly fight with my brain to do anything without feeling like a failure.

However, upon speaking to a friend of mine recently who's extremely successful in her side hustle, I've come to realise that I CAN do anything that I put my mind to; I just need the motivation and the drive to do it every day. She is no different than me and if anything she has more on her plate than I do, juggling a part-time job, her side hustle and her four kids. We're not comparing lives here, as everyone has different things on their plate even if they might not be so obvious, but we're all human, and we're all capable of achieving whatever we put our minds to.

Nothing has to be perfect straight away, heck, nothing is perfect FULLSTOP. Perfection is just an illusion that's been put on us by society; something completely unattainable, something that's not even real in most senses. Let's take social media for example - we scroll through our feeds, constantly looking at those who we aspire to be like; their bodies, their houses, where they go out to eat, etc. Social media is just a highlight reel of somebody's life and I know for a fact that no matter how confident someone is, everyone has their insecurities, down days, and everyone just feels like shit every now and then, but they're not gonna post that on their social media streams because that would more than likely ruin their "aesthetic". 

I need to stop thinking that I'm not good enough and actually start trying for once, and that starts with this blog. 

Watch this space...